Reach out to the new pastor’s wife

Susan interviews Betsy Borseth, wife of a Lutheran pastor in Oklahoma and a mother of three.

In their 25 years of ministry Betsy and her husband have moved 7 times. Some of those moves were smooth and some were not so smooth.

Like any woman who has been uprooted, Betsy grieved each time she moved away from friends and family and she longed for friendship and connection in her new community and church.

In all these years and in all her moves, the biggest challenge for Betsy has been recreating a sense of community. Any invitation from a new acquaintance was always hoped for and appreciated. Even something as simple as getting together for a cup of coffee.

But more often than not, the phone didn’t ring and very few reached out. Eventually, Betsy realized that she had to initiate.

Initiating as a newcomer often feels risky. Will this person reject my invitation for coffee? As a pastor’s wife, it has also been imperative for Betsy to find a friend who would accept her for herself – warts and all. This is an added challenge because the pastor’s wife is often held to a higher standard.

Through all her moves, Betsy has learned to view moving as an opportunity for a new beginning. She has found encouragement in Susan’s book, After the Boxes Are Unpacked, Elisabeth Elliot’s book Loneliness, and in an online After the Boxes Are Unpacked study group.

Scripture Betsy shares: Proverbs 3:5,6

Read more input from pastors’ wives

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