The faithful and true friend when you’re lonely

by Johanna

I love it here, but some days I feel very alone.

I’ve cried on three out of eight Sundays that we’ve been here because those are the days that seem to remind me the most that this doesn’t always feel like “home.” I long for the beginning of just one dear friendship with a woman here. My fear sometimes gets the best of me when I imagine that I’ll never find someone who needs or desires a friendship as much as I do.

Rationally, I know that this kind of friendship takes time – and it took time before – but I also know the blessing of true, deep friendship with other women and it makes me miss it all the more.

Maybe, if I’m honest, it’s not the “beginning” of that friendship that I long for.

In truth, maybe the beginning of the friendship I’m speaking of has already, well, begun. If I’m honest, what I long for is that already established friendship. The one where your past is known and accepted, your dreams for the future are shared and supported.

After being in one place for several years, it’s almost overwhelming to think of where to begin in friendships. I’m so used to being around people who know everything about me and there’s no need for explaining when you’re known so well. You’re just understood. My impatience in this area tells me I was maybe too comfortable where I was – too comfortable to notice someone who might be in the place where I am today.

I am reminded anew of how God cares for me and knows me perfectly; the God of the universe has inscribed me on the palms of His hands! (Isaiah 49:16) How could I wallow in the despair of being unknown when I belong to Him? He is a faithful and true friend and has longed for me to recognize Him as such.

Therefore, the Lord longs to be gracious to you, and therefore He waits on high to have compassion on you.  For the Lord is a God of justice; how blessed are all those who long for Him.
Isaiah 30:18

May my longing be to first seek the One who longs for me.