A Bittersweet Goodbye

sold signI know the time was right, but that doesn’t make it any easier. It’s never easy to let go of something that has become a part of your life and your memories for thirteen years.

When the “For Sale” sign went up in June, it became a reality that this would be the last summer at our little getaway place near Flagstaff, Arizona ― only an hour and a half from Phoenix. I knew selling would become inevitable as the years went by. The grandchildren were growing older, the small rooms that once were adequate seemed to be getting smaller, college was looming in the future, and their interests had broadened beyond our small community there.

When the “sold” sign went up soon after that, I walked from room to room, my eyes covering every inch of space within each room’s four walls, as my mind recalled the memories held there.

Our Happy Place

I could smell the cookies and brownies in the kitchen as they baked in the oven, with only the aroma left behind as they quickly disappeared off the platter. I could see all the smiling faces when they sat around the kitchen bar, knowing I had their full attention as they gathered to eat anything that wasn’t nailed down. It wasn’t about the food for me, it was the priceless interaction of conversation that I loved. I looked beyond the kitchen to the living area and saw every seat filled with six grandchildren, then spilling over on the floor with their friends. They always got such a kick out of me being able to flip a bottle of water right side up on the counter, teaching me to dance to their music, and singing popular songs along with them.

I could hear the laughter and giggles in the loft filled with bunk beds and sleeping bags long after “lights out!” echoed up the stairs. The empty stairs were once filled with flip-flops and sports shoes in hopes someone would claim them.  As I walked by the bathroom, I could hear the knocks on the door with a loud voice, “Hurry up, you’re taking too long, it’s my turn!”

Walking out on the deck, I took a deep breath of the cool, fresh air and smiled as I remembered the summer the deck became “Nana’s Nail Salon” for my granddaughters and their friends. “By appointment only,” I said. They waited patiently as I painted nails and toes of each girl. I could hear my grandsons and their friends playing board games on our deck, and soccer, dodge ball, and kickball in our large neighbor-shared backyard, where the balls always seemed to end up on our deck.

I sat down for a moment, and stared at the beauty of the flowers I planted each year. I gazed at the blue sky and green grass ― a different landscape from Phoenix in the summer.

I thought back over the thirteen years of memories, first with Bill, who loved coming here before he died. It was our place to rest, renew, and regroup. I called it our “Happy Place.” It was where I grieved in the solitude of long walks and where God soothed my broken heart as He began to put the pieces of my life back together again.

Then there is the legacy of memories for our grandchildren, who spent every summer there for thirteen years, and will, I’m sure, share crazy stories about “Cousin Camp” around the table when they are grown. Priceless memories were shared together with our beloved and long-time friends from Phoenix, who said many years ago, “There’s a place next door to us going up for sale, you might be interested….”  There were also other dear friends close by from Phoenix, and neighbors I looked forward to seeing each summer who became a part of our little community of friends.

this is my happy placeOur “Happy Place” was perfect for our Just Moved Ministry Staff and Board Retreats, where the most faithful, committed, and amazing women gathered for R&R, and to cast a vision, to plan, and to prepare for the year ahead. Not to mention, the great food, fun, laughter, and fellowship we shared! And, sometimes I would invite a friend for a weekend who simply needed encouragement and a little TLC.

A New Season

As I drove away this summer, I took one last glance at our “Happy Place” and my red geraniums left on the steps for the new owners. I was reminded of Ecclesiastes 3:1, There is a time for everything, a season for every activity under the heaven. This is a new season in my life now and I choose to embrace it wholeheartedly.

front stepsYou can do the same thing if you have had to let go of a place you loved. It’s not always easy when the place you left behind is intricately woven in your life, your heart, and your memories.  Perhaps you’ve experienced a move, or a military PCS. It could be downsizing, retirement, or other circumstances that have uprooted you beyond your control.

Cherish, Don’t Cling, to the Memories

Anytime during a hard or lonely day, you and I are blessed to have a storehouse of memories that reflect the place we loved and the special times spent with family and friends. Cherish your memories, don’t cling to them. Don’t let living in the past keep you from all God has planned for you in the future. We can acknowledge that moving is not the end, but the beginning of making new memories and new friends. We can choose to embrace a new place and all the opportunities to see God’s goodness and faithfulness.

Remember, God wastes nothing, not even having to move and leave behind what you hold most dear. This is a new season in your life too. Join me, and choose to embrace it today.

From my heart,

Susan MillerSusan

9 Comments

  1. Carol on September 17, 2018 at 9:32 am

    I’m a home stager, and I often meet clients who are clinging to memories, truly clinging to their house like the memories will go away if they have to sell. You hit the nail on the head when you said to cherish the memories, but don’t cling. My clients need to say goodbye to the four walls called a house and cherish the memories made there. Thanks for the wisdom you impart!

  2. Wanda Bird on September 13, 2018 at 7:45 pm

    Wow, as I read this I just kept coming back to how blessed, how lucky you all were and how you and your loved ones have a treasure chest of ( yes, now packed up) memories to take with you the rest of your lives! I’ve lived in a dozen different homes including some apartments, a townhouse, a cabin,
    a historical house and now a modern cottage. In all those places there were some good memories but also a ton of family conflict and much loneliness, isolation and wishing for family unity. Maybe it’s not the dwellings we leave behind but the bonds of togetherness we take with us out the door into the future that is the most important. I do envy you.

  3. Lindy Thonvold on September 13, 2018 at 6:02 am

    I read this story this morning with my cup of coffee. How sweet Susan, all the time,
    cooking and memories that you helped to give to your grandchildren. My youngest son
    is getting married in November, and I look forward to someday being able to provide this
    sweet time with my grandchildren. How precious this season of life is.

  4. Tish on September 12, 2018 at 5:17 pm

    Always the motivator & encourager for us all Susan. Love you my friend.

  5. Sharon on September 12, 2018 at 3:21 pm

    So beautifully written! You have made such wonderful memories with and for your grandchildren! I remember well your Happy Place and that I was blessed to stay there for a couple Just Moved Staff retreats! My last visit there was bittersweet for me as I shared with my co-workers that I would be retiring from my position at Just Moved and moving to Kansas to be close to family. And what a blessing that has been. Thank You for sharing from your heart!

  6. Sherri Brunson on September 12, 2018 at 2:31 pm

    Oh Susan! Spot on as always! Greg and I had the hardest time putting our Charleston house on the market. We have not lived there for 8 years but it was by far our favorite home. We knew it was time to let it go but oh how I wish I could just move it with me every couple of years.

  7. Gaye Moore on September 12, 2018 at 12:16 pm

    Thanks Susan, good timing; packers are here packing now…? Leaving where I was sure would be my last home and moving away from my children and grands is tearing at my heart.

  8. Donna on September 12, 2018 at 10:47 am

    Since I found (read myself and bought and given copies away!)you 11 years ago, I have moved two more times. And your encouraging messages still hit the bullseye! I want to start a Just Moved chapter in my area! I regret not meeting you while I attended SBC! Thankyou for all you do!

    • Paulette on September 12, 2018 at 1:17 pm

      Donna, we are so glad that Susan’s blogs/podcasts and articles are ministering and encouraging you! If you are interested in starting an After the Boxes study, please call the office 480.991.5268 and talk with JoAnn or Paulette. We would love to help walk you through that process.

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